Thursday, August 23, 2012

The daily struggle

Skeeter and I fall asleep every night with his arm around me, and my head resting on his chest - my right ear against him.

If you don't know me, you don't know that my left ear is the worst.

My alarm goes off for 5-10 minutes before Skeeter wakes up and realizes what the noise is.  He has to nudge me awake, since my left ear is the only one exposed.  I lift myself up, I can faintly hear the alarm - like it's upstairs or outside... Not next to me.

I stand up and immediately must fight the desire to vomit - I must maintain my balance.  The only noise I can hear is the noise my own ears produce because of my disability - and that noise sounds like I am driving 70 miles per hour through a tunnel.

It's painful, both mentally and physically.  It exhausts me.  For the first four hours, I have 0-20% hearing.  Most days, it's 10%.

This happens EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

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